Sun, November 24, 2013
Odd Hours of Death

The best man at our wedding just passed away.  He was also my husband's life-long friend.

I came across this paragraph on death from an unlikely source: writer Dean Koontz.  It really helped us look at his death...and death in general, in a new way.
This is from Koontz's book, Odd Hours, page 219:

"Grief can destroy you - or focus you.  You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you alone.  Or you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter of each day, and didn't allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it.  But when it's over and you're alone, you begin to see it wasn't just a movie and a dinner together, not just watching sunsets together, not just scrubbing the floor or washing dishes together or worrying over a high electric bill. It was everything, it was the why of life, every event and precious moment of it.  The answer to the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it, to the sanctity of it, you can't get off your knees for a long time- you're driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by the gratitude for what preceded the loss.  And the ache is always there, but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life."

References

Odd Hours by Dean Koontz, Page 219

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